Cracking the Code of Love

Prior to delving into the phenomenon of online dating, I had preconceived notions formed from the failure that my mother and several family friends had experienced with online dating websites. I’ve heard stories of meeting “matches” for the first time and realizing that they were not who they said they were in regards to their age and appearance. Some stories were indeed very comical and others were a bit nerve-wracking.

On October 8th, when the topic of online dating was introduced in lecture, Professor Jackson first played an ABC News story called, "Online Dating by the Numbers." In this story, the online dating website OkCupid is highlighted for their dominance in the online dating world, boasting more than 7 million users. Its success is due in part to the Harvard math graduates who apply statistical algorithms to each user’s profile. Becoming one of the "largest and most thorough databases of human interaction", these mathematicians were also able to uncover trends in online dating. One trend that stuck out to me was that men who began their message with "Howdy!" had a 40% better chance to engage in conversation with another woman than men who began their message with "Hey!"

With an interest in the math behind the match, I came across another ABC News story called, “Online Dating Tips: Amy Webb Finds True Love Code.” This story highlights a young woman, Amy Webb, who claims that she was meeting all the wrong guys online. She was determined to crack the code of online dating in order to meet quality men. She accomplished this by collecting data through fake male profiles and taking her findings to create a “super” profile page, specifically marketing to the type of men she wanted to meet. A few months later, she then met the man who became her husband. Amy then turned her digital dating science project into a book titled, “Data, A Love Story.” Today, she helps other women create the perfect online profile (impression management).

Online Dating Tips - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57asNMY5GIU

In the video, Amy assists a young woman named Laurie who is having trouble with finding quality men online. According to Amy, it is important not to underestimate the power of a profile picture; they matter! This means no pictures with friends and no pictures with alcohol. Another important tip Amy provides Laurie is not to intimidate potential matches. A week later, Laurie reported that she received much more attention through her online dating profile, and had several dates planned.

In Amy Webb’s TED talk called, “How I Hacked Online Dating,” she goes into detail with her personal experience of cracking the code. In this documentary, you can see first hand how Amy uses data and algorithms to hit rock bottom by going to dinner with Steve the I.T. guy, and creating the perfect online profile to find her soul mate. I found her strategy and approach both comical and brilliant.

TED Talk - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6wG_sAdP0U

With these trends and tips in mind, I created a fake profile on OkCupid today in Lab. I entered the username smileygirl56, and posted a fake profile picture with cleavage showing. The questionnaire was quickly completed and within minutes, messages were piling in the inbox! [Shout out to the pair in lab who began their message with "Howdy!"] While browsing around the website, there was a tab labeled "Y'all Got Issues," which displayed certain questions that myself and another user matched or did not match. I found this tab to be helpful because it showed what your shared interests were before even messaging someone.

In closing, Amy Webb states that there is an algorithm for love, but not what is presented online; it is in fact what we write ourselves.